Who Am I? You are Called Mother

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She sits through seasons in her life, watching as she evolves with the complexities that comes with the dawning of a new day.

She has walked through seasons of despair and hopelessness, but still she stands and works to make a difference with her life.

Who am I? She asks, as she seeks to answer the many questions in her head.

She gives her heart to the one who awakened the butterflies in her stomach. Together as one they desire to grow their circle of influence on the earth.

Who am I? She asks as she ponders about “what next” on this journey she has chosen to walk.

And then she watches her body change in the twinkle of an eye. Her once upon a time slim frame fills up to accommodate the life growing inside of her. Soon the baby bump is revealed and the mother within is seen and felt.

And then after what looks like a forever 9-month journey, her world comes to a temporary halt, she is star-struck when she meets and holds her newborn in her arms for the first time.

Who am I? She asks, as she reaches into the deep recesses of her soul to take in this moment of love so pure and beautiful.

She holds him close to her heart. She rocks him with arms so tender. She whispers his name and reaches out to stroke his chubby cheeks. She speaks words dripping with love into his tinny winny ears. She tells him how much he means to her. Her life changed forever. Continue reading

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What Makes a Scar Beautiful (2)?

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3 Lessons from My C-section Experience
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‘You will give birth like the Hebrew woman. You will push your baby yourself. You will have a normal delivery’, the middle-aged woman prayed as shouts of ‘Amen’ filled the atmosphere.

It was the usual weekly ante-natal clinic. Many women showed up with different stomach sizes. Some carried their bumps with grace, some struggled through each week with their huge bumps, while some wore the strains of pregnancy like an ornament.

Faces were puffed up, noses became broader for some as the weeks rolled by, hips widened and many could hardly remember what they looked like. The life growing in us had changed us physically and emotionally.

I whispered my ‘Amen’ too as the middle-aged nurse rounded up her prayer for us. I was looking forward to a quick and safe delivery. Infact I envisaged a shorter time in labour because I had prayed so much and my faith was over the roof.

But then the morning after my last ante-natal clinic, a toilet bowl filled with blood led to my very first C-section experience.

I was heartbroken hearing the doctor explain why this was the best option for me now. I felt God had let me down and I did not even know what to expect.

I knew women who had C-sections. I had seen their scars but hearing some women openly reject C-sections overtime as a choice of birth made me wonder at times. But here I was about to be cut open to give life to another.

I grabbed my Bible and began to read Psalm 91 aloud. I read it over and over until I was wheeled into the theatre. I woke up minutes later, the anaesthetic slowly fading away, I was groggy and my belly felt empty, and then I asked, “Where is my baby? Where is my baby? ”

And then I beheld the most beautiful thing snuggled up in my husband’s arms. I was a mother again five years after having my first child. I touched beneath my belly, the cut was covered up with plasters and had just began its healing process.

It was a priceless moment. I realised then that pushes or cuts do not matter. What matters is a mother’s strength and courage in giving life to another. Here are 3 lessons from my C-section experience. Continue reading

What Every Little Girl Needs to Know

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I wrote this post some days ago in honour of the girl child…..

“Aunty, I will like to go back to school one day”. These were the words of a young teenage girl I met many years ago.

She sold recharge cards around the stadium in town, while I was in the University. And then somehow our paths crossed.

She lived with her aunt and had to stop going to school because of lack of funds. So she was at that spot every day trying to make money for her aunty.

I gave her things when I could and always encouraged her never to give up on her dreams of getting an education. She liked me a lot and always looked forward to my visits.

Years have passed, I graduated and moved on and never got to see my teenage friend again. I wonder if my words took deep roots in her heart, and if she ever returned to school.

Fast forward to some years later. I was on my way to work in the evening. I was on a night shift through that week. So after alighting at my bus-stop, I will walk down a long stretch of quiet road to my office.

It was usually between 6.30pm and 7.30pm. I  walked very fast because of the lonely nature of the road. On one of those days, I noticed a little girl of about 9 years old hawking her goods meters away from me.

And then I saw a middle-aged man by her side. They looked like they knew each other. He was squeezing her backside and fondling her body with a nasty look on his face. She pushed his hand away and he put it back where he wanted.

I took the next turn to my office as I wondered about what could happen to that little girl. Will that young man violate her? Will he sexually abuse her and tell her never to tell anyone? Will he steal her innocence and keep luring her with gifts? Why was she hawking at this time of the day? These were the questions in head.

There are still many young girls today in different parts of the world who have never been to school. Others were forced to drop out because of poverty and ignorance. Many of these girls suffer physical, mental and sexual abuse before turning 18. Continue reading

What Makes a Scar Beautiful?

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I stood alongside a woman a few weeks ago in the market. She was tall, bubbly and looked like she was in her 40’s. She had a friendly look and also many words to speak, but something in the words she spoke made me turn my entire focus on her.

How does a young married woman live through losing 7 babies?

How does she walk through life with so much joy after losing 7 children weeks after their birth?

How come she is so proud to show the world her scars?

These were the questions in my head and many more, as I listened to this woman share her story.

She got married like every other woman and was excited to start a family. She got pregnant and then her travails started.

She took in and kept losing the children. Hmm! I was in shock but then I had to ask her, ”Ma, were you having miscarriages or what? ” The words that followed had me sober all day. In her words, ”I will give birth to the child and they will die after weeks or few months”.

I was unable to process the pain and trauma this woman must have been through. Yet she was all smiles and full of gratitude as she shared her story. Continue reading

3 Ways to Get Inspired for Your Motherhood Walk

pexels-photo-256807Do you get worn out sometimes doing the same things over and over again?

Do you feel like shutting out on some days just to regain your sanity?

Do you crave being alone in your personal space away from the noise and mess ?

Do you long for those alone moments where silence can become the best companion?

If you answered yes to these questions, then you are a mother to newborns, toddlers and young children😀😀😀

I remember some years back after a very exhausting day, I was trying to catch a nap when I suddenly felt something tugging at my eyelids. The next voice I hear asks, ‘Mummy are you sleeping?’🙄🙄

Ahhh, this child. You see me with my eyes closed and you are asking me if I am sleeping.**shaking my head with eyes wide open**. But it is amazing how little children come into your world and change a lot of things.

You will give more as a mother, you will love more, you will learn to adapt and you will learn patience while interacting with your little ones.

Your motherhood walk is in seasons. There will be seasons of growth, seasons of learning, seasons of teaching and seasons of impacting. But while on this walk, distractions will come, challenges will show up and you may even get to loose focus of what it means to be a mother on this journey.

But then, are you willing to find new ways to make your motherhood walk a memorable one? Here are 3 ways that you can find inspiration for your motherhood walk. Continue reading

Why I Wrote the Book ‘Dear mother’

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I remember sitting down somewhere in my room with tears rolling down my eyes some years ago. My emotions had taken a better part of me.

My mother had just left after a 6 week stay with me following the birth of my first child. She had helped to ease my transition into motherhood with her presence and it was now time for her to leave. She said goodbye and I was left alone to begin my motherhood walk.

At about this time last year, I had a deep desire in my heart to inspire mothers. You will agree with me that mothers go through a lot, from caring for their little ones, to building their character, to house-keeping, to working 9 to 5 jobs and still being able to make their homes a safe and secure haven.

You also know how some mothers are trying so much to balance work and family, while there are others who are struggling daily to find purpose and meaning in their lives as stay-at-home mothers. So I decided to start a blog and write to inspire and encourage them. I also began to write a ” Dear mother ” series of posts which was me writing from my heart and penning down my thoughts to inspire mothers in their motherhood journey.

And so, a few months ago, I decided to put those thoughts together in an e- book to give mothers a good dose of inspiration for their motherhood walk. I also wanted them to receive fresh inspiration everyday in the month. Hence the book, DEAR MOTHER: 30 DAYS OF FRESH INSPIRATION FOR YOUR MOTHERHOOD WALK was born. Continue reading

5 Reasons Why You Must Embrace Your Role As A Mother

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About 8 years ago, I stared at my newborn son by my side. His eyes were wide open adjusting to life outside my body. I was amazed! This life I carried inside me for 9 long months was finally here. He stared back at me even as I held onto his little finger.

I had many questions in my head and heart. I was tired from the pains of birthing, but all I wanted was a warm bath and the comfort of my bedroom. Yet, I thought about what lay ahead of me.

I was excited but also afraid of this new journey. This was a new path. I was a mother now and my life was about to change forever.

Can you remember how you felt seeing your baby for the first time?

What kind of emotions did you express?

Did you quickly embrace your new role?

Did you feel bad about this new journey?

Yes, being a mother is the greatest job in the world.

But you will also agree with me that being a mother can be hard and overwhelming sometimes.

You will loose your sanity sometimes.

You will feel afraid on some days.

You will make mistakes.

You will cry silent tears.

You will crave being alone on other days.

You will feel defeat sometimes.

And you may even want to give it all up.

But can you look back at that moment when you held your newborn in your arms.

What did you feel in your heart?

Motherhood is a gift. Mother is a high calling.

You are a mother and you are here to bless and change lives forever.

Are you willing to embrace this role you have been given?

Are you ready to discover more about you?

Here are 5 Reasons Why You Must Embrace Your Role As a Mother:
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1. You have the capacity to feed multitudes (generations).

2. You carry a message that has the capacity to change lives.

3. You have the ability to create little everyday miracles.

4. You have the capacity to influence lives.

5. You have the opportunity to leave a lasting legacy.

And yes, generations after you will carry your message, if you will only embrace your role today.

 

Many Hugs,

Ufuoma.

Who Raised This Child + 3 Lessons From a Parent Named Mordecai

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Have you ever met some children display such great confidence? And then you wonder, who raised this child?

Have you ever met a child or teenager whose sound character and values leaves you speechless? And then you ask, who are your parents?

I once sat with a group of people having a conversation and I gave a totally different viewpoint while others toed a particular train of thought. I was only reflecting some things I learnt from home and this made me look different.

Someone once told me about a teenager who stood out in an entire class. The teacher commented that this teenager was so mature and different in her approach. People noticed and it stood her apart in the crowd. And somebody raised her right.

There was a young girl named Esther in the Bible. She rose from being an orphan to becoming a queen in her time. She is perhaps remembered for one of the most profound statements in the bible, “If I perish, I perish.”

She spoke these words when she was about to go in to meet the King in a time when it was forbidden to do so.

She damned all the consequences and went in because she had to fight to save her people.

Her uncle had earlier told her that if she did nothing to fight for her people, deliverance will arise from another place and that she and her father’s house will be destroyed.

This young woman found her purpose in the words that her uncle spoke to her. She steps into her purpose and fights to save and preserve the lives and generation of her people.

And yes, she did.

But she was an orphan who was raised by her uncle Mordecai. This parent figure in her life had put a lot of passion into raising a child that was not his.

He taught her obedience, he checked up on her always and he challenged her to stand up always and fight for a good cause.

What was it about Esther that commanded favour?

What was it that moved Esther from unknown to a person of influence in her generation?

Think about the man who raised her.

Find below👇👇👇

3 LESSONS FROM A PARENT NAMED MORDECAI
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1. You must always check up on your children. Continue reading

The Men In Your Life And The Lessons They Have To Share

mmI remember many years ago, a friend lost her mom whilst in school, her family was in pain and debt. She was also on the verge of being sent out of school. Her dreams of getting an education was about to end.

I was unsettled. I got home and told my dad. He was touched. He offered to help. And he did. My friend was not thrown out of school. And yes, she completed her education.

Fast forward to a few years later, as I began my journey to the University. I happened to school faraway from home, and each time I embarked on that journey to school, my father will call me aside and pray for me.

Years have passed, but I still remember those prayers and how I journeyed throughout my years in school without any sort of mishap or tragedy. I am also aware that those prayers sustained me even in my darkest hours.

I also still have clear memories from my childhood of my father always being there for us.

How he will pick us up from school everyday, drop us off at home and go back to work.

How we looked forward to Friday treats at a supermarket close to home.

How he prayed over me when I was very sick as a young child.

How he will take his time to get involved with our school work and activities.

How he fought through every difficult season valiantly.

How he showed us that your family always comes first.

And yes, children never really forget….

You see , life is a circle of lessons and you can open your heart to learn irrespective of who the teacher is.

I have learnt from my father, many life lessons over the years. And not just from him but from the men in my life. Continue reading

7 Reasons Why You Should Invest In Children

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“To invest in a child is to invest in our common future. The world of tomorrow will inherit the children of today.” UNICEF

Have you ever watched the faces of parents whose child is being celebrated for his/her moral and academic excellence?

Do you see how much they beam with pride as their child walks up the stage to receive his award or prizes?

It is a moment worth capturing and a season worth celebrating. And for that parent, every time invested to nurture, support and encourage is worth it.

So, why are children an important part of our lives.

Why do children matter?

Why should you invest time and resources in the lives of your children?

Find below 7 reasons why you should invest in the lives of your children;

Those born by you, those adopted by you, those around you and those we come in contact with every single day.

1. CHILDREN ARE THE HOPE OF THE FUTURE.

When I first listened to Malala Yousafzai, the young Pakistani teenage girl who was shot by the Taliban, I was amazed at her depth and sense of purpose.

She is an advocate for girl child education. She is also the youngest Nobel prize winner.

Each time I watch or read about her and her work, I am convinced that children are the hope of the future and you must invest in them now.

Invest your time to teach them the right values just like Malala’s parents invested in their daughter. Read her words below👇👇

“We realize the importance of our voices only when we are silenced.”

“One child, one teacher, one book, one pen can change the world.”

“When the whole world is silent, even one voice becomes powerful.” Malala Yousafzai

When you listen to such words spoken by a young girl, then you know that children are the hope of the future.

Will you keep this hope alive today in your families?

2. CHILDREN ARE THE LIGHT THAT WILL SHINE IN THE NEXT GENERATION.

What happens when you turn on the light in a very dark room?

Darkness disappears and light reveals the true state of the room.

Your children ought to be like that light that dispels darkness everytime they show up.

Every child was born to soar and shine.

Every child has light within them.

Every child is a potential ray of light in a very dark world.

Every child can activate his/her light to shine for generations to come.

Will you nurture that light in your child?

Will you teach your child to shine today and everyday?

3. CHILDREN ARE A TRUE REFLECTION OF OUR VALUES. Continue reading